Introduction
Your toddler is starting to learn simple skills. They’re becoming more independent and will want to do more things on their own, yet they’ll still need your help and support to take care of their needs.
From flossing and toilet teaching to staying safe and getting dressed, on this page, you’ll find information to take care of your toddler’s everyday needs.
Sleeping
- Overview
- Naps
- Nightmares and night terrors
- Moving from crib to bed
- Older toddlers and bedtime routines
In this Section:
Overview
Most toddlers need to sleep 11–14 hours a day, including naps. You can often tell if your toddler is sleeping enough by the way they act during the day. If they’re cranky or fall asleep in addition to their regular naptime, they might need more sleep at night.
A regular bedtime routine helps you and your toddler rest well at night. End your days with time for quiet and calm activities so they can shift their active day to getting ready for sleep. Try quiet play time after supper, then a 20 minute bedtime routine such as a bath, brushing teeth and a bedtime song or story. When your child knows what will happen next, they’ll feel more secure and ready for bed.
When you and your partner take turns putting your child to bed, they’ll learn that the routine is the same, even with different people. This also makes it much easier for a family member, friend or babysitter to put them to bed when you’re not there.
Toddlers are often afraid of being separated from their parents. You show confidence that your toddler can settle themselves when you calmly say “Goodnight,” give them a hug, and leave the room.
Let your child know where you’ll be and that you’ll see them in the morning. Be patient—it may take time for your toddler to learn to go to sleep on their own.
If your toddler is having trouble going to sleep and staying asleep in the night, these suggestions may help:
- Get them ready for bed before they’re too tired. Move bedtime earlier by 15–20 minutes each night until you reach a bedtime of 7–8 pm.
- Read and look at books or use quiet play with blocks or puzzles with them before bedtime.
- Keep bedtime routine a screen-free time for you and your child. They need your time and attention after a busy and active day—some toddlers wake up at night because they want more time with their parents.
Talk with your child in the daytime about what bedtime will look like, especially if you’re making any changes. Do not wait till bedtime to talk about it. Some things you can say are: “I’m going to stay beside you until you fall asleep, then I’ll go do the dishes and you’ll be asleep in your bed.” “If you wake up at night, I’ll help you settle back into your bed, then I’ll go back to my bed.” “We’re going to read a book about trains tonight at bedtime, instead of watching TV.”
Encourage your toddler to use a comfort object or a small, quiet toy at bedtime such as a toy dinosaur, teddy bear or a blanket. Tell your toddler that this object can help them settle and be calm at bedtime and in the night when they wake up. If you have always been the one to settle your child to sleep, it may take them a few weeks to learn that they can do it themselves.
Your toddler doesn’t have to cry for long periods of time to learn how to sleep on their own. They need your loving support, small changes and lots of practice to learn how. Talk with your child about how well they’re learning how to sleep on their own. Notice and comment on what they did to encourage little steps they’re taking instead of focusing on what might be going wrong. For example, you could say something like, “You did such a good job going back into your own bed last night when you woke up,” or, “You woke up last night but then you got back into bed, and before you knew it, you were off to sleep.”
If your toddler is nursing or taking a bottle frequently at night, you can decrease the amount of feeds to help them learn how to sleep without it. Gradually decrease the amount such as from 250 ml (1 cup) to 200 ml (about ¾ cup), to 150 ml (about ½ cup) and so on over a week or two. If you’re breastfeeding, take them off the breast after a shorter feeding time each night over a week or so. Cuddle and put your toddler back into their bed or crib for the rest of the night.
If you have any concerns about your toddler’s sleep, call Health Link at 811 or talk with your health care provider.
Getting ready for sleep
TVs and electronic devices tell the brain that it’s time to be awake. Everyone in the family should limit using these devices for at least an hour before bedtime. It’s not recommended to have a TV or electronic device in your child’s bedroom.
“Having comfort at bedtime really helped us. It’s downtime when we can snuggle and read and catch up on the day and that’s a nice way to settle down for the evening for all of us. It really helps.”
~Rosie, mom of two children
Naps
Children often stop having morning naps in the young toddler stage, but continue to have a 1–2 hour nap in the afternoon. Toddlers will nap for however long they need, but you may find that if your child naps for more than 2 hours at a time, or late in the afternoon, they may have trouble falling asleep at night.
Your older toddler may stop napping in the afternoon, but end up quite fussy later in the day. If this happens, give them quiet time in the afternoon on their own in their room reading books or playing with toys. If they’re tired they may fall asleep and if not then the quiet time will help them stay calm and happy the rest of the day.
When others are looking after your child, talk with them about your child’s sleep routine and let them know if your child takes naps and for how long. Your toddler will feel safer with a familiar and consistent routine.
Nightmares and night terrors
Some children have frightening dreams (nightmares) that they may be able to describe afterwards. It’s normal to have nightmares once in a while. They usually happen in the second half of the night.
A nightmare can wake your child. They might be scared and need to be cuddled and comforted by you. They may have trouble getting back to sleep.
If your child is having many nightmares, it might be because they’re concerned about something that has scared or hurt them or because of a big change such as:
- new child care
- new home
- new baby
Talk with your child about their fears in the daytime, when everyone is awake and rested.
Night terrors (sleep terrors) are different. During a night terror, children’s eyes will be open and they’ll seem to be awake but they are not. They may also scream or move about during their sleep. A child may not be aware of anyone around them and usually don’t remember the night terror. For this reason, night terrors may be much more upsetting for you than for your child.
Night terrors usually happen in the first part of the night, about 1–4 hours after falling asleep. They often happen at the same time each night and usually last only a few minutes. Night terrors usually peak at about 2 years and they’re more common in boys.
If your child is having a night terror, make sure they’re safe but don’t try to comfort or wake them. If your child is having night terrors at the same time each night, try waking them 10–15 minutes before that time. Doing this for a few weeks may break the cycle. Night terrors are more common when the child is not getting enough sleep. It may help to move bedtime earlier by a few minutes each night to see if that helps.
If your child is having a lot of trouble sleeping or if night terrors are affecting their health or your family life, call Health Link at 811 or talk with your health care provider.
Moving from crib to bed
Going from a crib to a bed is a big step for both toddlers and parents. Your young toddler is safer in their crib until they start trying to climb out of it. Prevent injuries by moving your toddler to a bed before they can climb out of their crib. Before moving your toddler, check to make sure their room is safe and child-friendly. Learn more about preventing injuries.
Many toddlers have trouble adjusting to being in a bed. When moving from a crib to a bed, continue with your bedtime routines. They may change a little and you may now be reading a book in bed instead of reading it in a rocking chair.
Help your toddler move into a bed
- Talk with them during the day about the move and how big they’re getting. Be positive.
- Get books from the library and read together about moving to a bed.
- Practice laying in the bed for naps or bedtime before expecting them to sleep in it.
- Use a side rail or put their mattress on the floor to keep them from falling.
- Offer them a favourite toy or blanket for comfort and security.
- Be clear about where they need to sleep now (in the bed) and where you’ll be. Use words to help them know what you expect from them during bedtime.
- Play soft music or use a nightlight to help them settle down before falling asleep. Learn more about nightlight safety.
Older toddlers and bedtime routines
Your older toddler may need to talk, sing, look at books, or play quietly to help them relax before they fall asleep. They’ll drift off to sleep when they’re ready. They may find extra comfort and security from special objects like a blanket or a soft, stuffed toy. If your toddler is in a crib, keep it free of clutter so they cannot climb over the crib rails. Nearly half of all crib-related injuries every year are due to falls.
Most toddlers will try to come out of their room after they’ve been put to bed. They may want to come out for all kinds of reasons, such as they’re more independent and want more control of their life or because they’re anxious about being away from you.
Being in a bed, with more freedom, may be both exciting and scary for children and they may:
- Beg to stay up or ask over and over for one more drink, story or cuddle
- Refuse to lie down or get up many times
- React with strong emotions like screaming or yelling
Stay calm, especially if your child is not. Your older toddler can learn that they need to stay in bed so they can go to sleep. You can promote peaceful bedtimes by providing warmth and structure. Here are some examples:
Provide warmth
- Realize that many children find moving to a bed both exciting and scary.
- Be matter-of-fact and speak with a calm and friendly voice.
- Be calm by practicing self-regulation. Your calm presence will help calm your child.
- Focus on your child during the time it takes to get them ready for bed. Turn off cell phones and enjoy this time with things such as a song, story, talking about their day or plans for tomorrow. Share one good thing about each of your days. If there are any problems to discuss, talk about them earlier in the day—not at bedtime.
- Reassure your child that you’ll be nearby and will keep them safe.
- Give them a kiss, a hug and say goodnight before you leave their bedroom.
Provide structure
- Keep a regular bedtime routine.
- Keep bedtime calm and quiet.
- If your child doesn’t like the door closed, try talking to them about why the door needs to be closed. Practice being in the room with the door closed in the daytime and help them learn that it’s okay. Never lock your child’s bedroom door.
- If they come out of their bedroom after you’ve put them to bed, take their hand, walk them back to their room, remind them that it’s bedtime and tuck them in.
- Avoid arguing. Simply say, “It’s time for bed.” You may have to do this many times and for several nights before they accept it.
- Be kind and firm. By being kind, you let them know you understand they would rather stay awake. By being firm, you let them know that it really is bedtime.
Toilet teaching
Is your child ready?
Most children are at least 2 ½ or even 3 years old before they’re ready to learn how to use the toilet. Some boys are not ready until they’re 3 ½ or 4 years old. You cannot rush toilet teaching. Wait until your child wants to learn and is physically ready—when the muscles that control their bowel and bladder are strong enough.
Toilet teaching will take less time, be easier, and less frustrating if you wait until your child is ready and don’t rush the process.
Your child may be ready to use a toilet when they:
- are able to stay dry for several hours or through the night
- have bowel movements at fairly predictable times and are getting better at controlling them
- know they’re urinating or having a bowel movement. They may even tell you when they need a clean diaper.
- don’t like to be in a wet or dirty diaper
- can pull down loose-fitting pants and follow simple directions
- show interest in using the potty chair or in other people using the toilet
- can tell you they need to use the toilet
“Every child is so different… don’t get too stressed about it. Have patience.”
~Kelly, parent of a toddler
It takes time to learn to use the toilet
Your child may not be able to make it to the toilet on time when they’re learning. This may upset them. Reassure your child that it’s part of learning. A calm, matter-of-fact approach will help them feel better about what happened.
Learning to use a toilet
There are many things you can do to help your toddler learn to use the toilet. Be consistent—if your child has other caregivers, talk to them about what you’re doing to help your child use the toilet. Be patient, positive and relaxed. Children learn in their own way and on their own time. Don’t set deadlines or get into power struggles. Expect setbacks if routines change, like starting child care or the arrival of a new baby. Here are several more things you can do:
- Help your toddler recognize when they’re urinating or having a bowel movement by talking about it—use words that are familiar to your family.
- Read stories about using a toilet or potty. Tell them that you and other people use the toilet too.
- Let them see you empty the contents of their dirty diapers into the toilet and flush. This will help them see where bowel movements go.
- If you use disposable diapers, your toddler may not feel wet. They may learn to use the toilet faster if you switch to cloth diapers, as they’ll be able to notice when they have a wet or soiled diaper.
- Show your child the potty chair or adapted toilet-seat. Tell them how it’s used and that you’ll help them.
- Ask them to tell you when they need to go to the toilet. They won’t be able to wait more than a few moments after telling you.
- Watch for signs they’re about to go such as stopping what they’re doing, looking down or off in the distance or saying, “Uh-oh.” They may also fidget or hold their hand between their legs. If you ask your toddler if they have to go, they’ll likely say “No.” You may get a better response if you say, “Looks like you have to go to the bathroom,” or “Let’s get you to the bathroom.”
- Stay with them or give them books to read while they’re on the toilet or potty chair.
- Little boys may want to urinate standing up, like other boys or their parent. It might be easier for them to learn in a sitting position.
- Help your child with wiping after a bowel movement. Your child may need help with this until they’re about 4−5 years old. Teach girls to wipe from front to back to help prevent infections caused by getting stool near their urethra or vagina.
- Take your toddler to the toilet or potty chair when they wake up in the morning, after naps, after meals, before going out and before a bath.
- Put the potty chair in a bathroom close to where your toddler spends most of the day. Keep a few books there to help them sit longer.
- Dress your toddler in clothes that are easy to pull up and down.
- Run the water. The sound may help your child feel the urge to urinate.
Support your toddler’s efforts even if they’re not successful at using the toilet. If your child is not making progress after a couple of weeks, they’re likely not yet ready to learn. Try again in a few weeks or when they seem more interested.
“I switched to cloth diapers when my daughter was toilet training. Then she knew when she was wet and didn’t like it. It really helped!”
~Rebecca, mom of three children
Hand washing
Get your toddler into the habit of washing their hands, whenever they use the toilet.
Potty chair
If you use a potty chair, make sure it’s sturdy and doesn’t tip easily. Your child’s feet should be on the floor. A potty chair may help your child feel safer, especially if they’re afraid of falling into the toilet. They’ll be able to get on and off without your help and will see the results of their effort—their own urine or bowel movement. Follow the manufacturer’s instructions for cleaning or sanitizing the potty chair.
Toilet-seat adapter
If you use a toilet-seat adapter:
- Make sure it fits securely on the toilet. If not, it may pinch your child’s leg or they may be afraid of falling when it wiggles.
- Use a step stool to help your child get on and off the toilet more easily. They may feel safer if their feet touch the step stool when they’re seated.
Many children are afraid of being flushed down the toilet. Your child may be scared if the toilet is flushed while they’re sitting on it. Remind them that they’re too big for this to happen. Respect their fear by letting your child flush the toilet after they’re off.
“Toileting feels challenging for everyone. Just knowing that children are on their own schedule can help. Your child doesn’t have to be potty trained first, and they might even be last! Watch for their interest and keep the conversations going.”
~Grace, mom of a preschooler
Dressing
Older toddlers get better at dressing and undressing themselves. They may not be able to get in and out of their clothes quickly, however they need a chance to learn what they can do on their own. Let them help with the steps they can do, then gradually let them do it all by themselves.
Your toddler may find it easier to dress and undress if they wear:
- clothes with elastic waists
- shoes and boots that slip on or do up with Velcro®. Most children cannot tie their own shoes until they’re 5–6 years old.
Toddlers like to make their own choices. You may find your toddler picks the same clothes day after day. If you divide their clothes into special occasion and play clothes, you can let them choose from the clothes that are best for what they’re going to do.
Teeth and mouth
- Baby teeth
- Helping your child care for their teeth
- Using dental floss
- Planning your child’s dental visit
In this Section:
Baby teeth
Toddlers continue to get new teeth. Some back teeth (first primary molars) may come in by the time your toddler is 18 months. The second primary molars usually come in sometime between 2–3 years old. Molars have pits and grooves on the chewing surfaces that can trap food and germs. Tooth decay can start if your toddler’s teeth are not kept well-cleaned.
Most toddlers have all 20 baby teeth by the time they’re 3 years old.
Help keep your toddler’s teeth and mouth healthy:
- Have planned meals and snacks. Eating and drinking all day can put your toddler at risk of developing tooth decay.
- If you’re serving sweet foods, serve them with a meal. The extra saliva produced at mealtime will help protect your toddler’s teeth.
- Brush their teeth twice a day—once in the morning and once before bed.
Keep toothpaste out of reach and in a safe place. Your toddler may want to brush their own teeth except they’re still too young to do a good job. Let them start, then help them finish. When your toddler is able to write their name, they’ll have the co-ordination to brush and floss their own teeth properly.
Helping your child care for their teeth
- Brush their teeth twice a day with their own toothbrush and fluoride toothpaste. Use an amount of toothpaste the size of a grain of rice. It might help to sing a song or set a timer for about 2 minutes to help your child learn how long it takes to do a good job. It may take a while to work up to 2 minutes—the key is sticking to the routine every day. Teach them to spit out and not swallow any toothpaste.
- Brush their tongue gently from back to front.
- Floss teeth that touch each other.
- Check for tooth decay once a month.
- Encourage your child by noticing when they take good care of their teeth. Tell them that they’re helping their teeth and gums grow strong and healthy.
- Set a good example by letting them see you brushing and flossing your own teeth.
Using dental floss
Flossing gets rid of food and plaque build-up between your child’s teeth. Begin flossing every day once their teeth touch one another.
- Cut a piece of floss as long as your child’s arm. Wrap it around your middle fingers, leaving about 5 cm (2 inches) of it between your hands. Using your index (pointer) fingers, guide the floss between your child’s teeth.
- Wrap the floss in a ‘C’ shape around the base of the tooth, where the tooth meets the gums.
- Starting at the gum line, wipe the full edge of the tooth with the floss, 2–3 times. Floss both sides of each tooth and the back of all molars. Change to a new section of floss as you move to each tooth.
Planning your child’s dental visit
Children who go to the dentist regularly have less tooth decay. These visits also help your child learn about and get comfortable with dental care. To have a successful visit:
- Plan their visit for a time when your child will be alert and not tired or hungry.
- Play a dentist game with them before you go. Have them lie down. Shine a light into their mouth and count their teeth. Switch roles so they can be the dentist too.
- Use positive, encouraging words to congratulate your child on their co-operation when they’re done.
- Bring along your child’s favourite toy or stuffed animal, if they have one.
Fluoride Varnish Visits
Health checkups
- Recommended checkups
- Well child clinic visits
- Oral health
- Vision
In this Section:
Recommended checkups
See your child’s health care providers as scheduled and based on your family’s needs. This will help keep your toddler as healthy as possible. Public health nurses and other health care providers can help if you have questions or concerns about your toddler’s health, growth and development or other family issues. Learn more about health checkups to keep children healthy and safe at any age.
Well child clinic visits
Your toddler is due for immunizations at 12 and 18 months. Call your community or public health centre about one month ahead of time to make an appointment. If your child’s immunizations are not up to date, talk to your public health nurse about how to get back on schedule. Learn more about immunizations.
During your visit, your public health nurse will also check things such as your child’s growth, ask about their health, as well as about how you’re doing and answer any questions you may have. Learn more about public health nurses.
Oral health
If you haven’t already, set up regular visits to the dentist for your toddler. Take your child to see a dentist by the time they’re 12 months old or within 6 months of their first tooth coming in, whichever comes first. If your family has limited income and needs support for dental care, you may qualify for the Alberta Child Health Benefit. Learn more about financial support for dental care.
Vision
Your child should have their vision checked by an optometrist by the time they’re 2–5 years old. Children who have a family history of childhood eye problems or who are having problems with their vision should see an optometrist sooner. Your child may be having problems with their vision if they:
- cover one eye or tilt their head to look at things
- hold things very close
- don’t recognize you from a distance
- have a cloudy film on any part of their eye
Vision and hearing tests are offered in Alberta at no cost for children 18 years and younger. For more information, call Health Link at 811 or talk with your health care provider.
Call Health Link at 811 or your health care provider if your child has any of the following:
- does not understand someone unless they’re facing them or in the same room
- speaks loudly
- wants the volume of music or the TV turned up very loud
- does not respond when called
- needs things to be repeated
- has any other signs that concern you
Preventing injuries
Toddlers are very curious and active explorers. Your toddler can now climb, slide, swing, open doors and move quickly. They’re still too young to know what’s safe and to remember all of the safety rules. It will take them time to learn these rules. Because of this, your toddler is more likely to get into dangerous situations and be at risk of injuries. Watch them closely whenever they’re awake.
For their age and stage of development, here are some areas that need attention to keep your toddler safe from injuries.
- Falls
- Burns and scalds
- Water safety
- Choking and poisoning
- Pet and animal safety
- Playing outdoors
- Trampolines
- Car seats
Learn more about preventing injuries in the early years.
Be safe around water
Toddlers are attracted to water, however they don’t understand the danger. Even when your child knows how to swim, supervise them at all times.